Tag: transman

Hey man, what are your tips with dealing with dysphoria when you’re 16, your out to only 2 friends who you don’t see too often, and your parents are very transphobic? I plan to start my transition a few months before I turn 18, with my goal of being on t with my name changed by the time I start college. Luckily for me, I have my entire senior year to work towards that..

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Hey there.

I went and found the posts tagged dysphoria in hopes they might have some helpful information for you, so feel free to browse through that if you’ve got a minute.
It’s pretty tough when you’re first coming out – there’s much less physical and emotional supports for you. Firstly, I’d like to extend the invitation to you or anyone else who feels they might need it to contact me directly and have a chat – just specify that you’d rather keep the conversation private and I will certainly honour that.

Secondly, there’s a wide variety of IRL and online support groups, especially youth related, that I feel might be beneficial to you. They’re generally categorized by general geographic location, so perhaps try some google-fu akin to “online trans support groups ### area” or something. 

Finally, know you’re not alone. There are a lot of other men going through similar experiences, in similar situations. We may not all be the same, but we can all support one another. This shit isn’t easy, and you never have to go through it alone.

Any tips on being stealth and looking for love? I find that being trans and looking for someone who I could spend the rest of my life hard. I am afraid that I’ll find someone and when I tell them that I haven’t always identified as a male they will ether hate me or see me as a female or worse out me.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

My Wife and I have been speaking about this a lot recently, probably due to the fact that whenever we have difficult periods in our life we turn inward to each other and our little family and focus on the good we have around us.

I met my Wife during a time I deliberately was “not looking” for a partner. I’d had a series of adolescent relationships that lasted for several years each, and I was finally in a place where I felt I could simply be with myself. I think that had a lot to do with why my Wife and I met; neither of us were looking. How we met was literally serendipity, but I’m not going into that.

I feel like being stealth is kind of the same as though you’ve got any other medical condition; not particularly first date type material but if you have an inkling that things may take a long-term type run, better to be up front about anything right off the bat rather than wait.

The number one ultimate piece of advice I can give you regarding relationships is this: communication and honesty. They’re of the most importance – and don’t come easy, especially with a budding relationship. But I can’t stress how important communication and honesty are.

Stop, breathe, and know that there is someone out there for every one.

Do you always use your stp or is there time when you don’t? Like do you sleep with it?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

If I am awake and have showered, my STP is in my jocks. Always.

As for pissing, sometimes in the comfort of my own home I’ll sit to pee – especially if the trip to the toilet is for erm, multi tasking? ha.

But as for when I’m out and about, at work etc – I will always stand to pee. The exception to this is occasionally when I am absolutely blind drunk and know there’s significant chance I will piss all over myself if I stand. That would likely happen if I were natal male, anyway. Sometimes the floor moves when you’re drunk.

As for sleeping with it, I generally prefer to sleep with a Mr Limpy or some other smaller kind of packer. I don’t usually have to pee during the night, and having a peecock floating about in your boxer shorts is not as comfortable as a Mr Limpy, which is significantly smaller and squishier.

How do you take T and have you tried other ways (eg injection, pellets…)?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I currently inject 4ml of Reandron 1000 into my butt every 10 weeks. This is a slow release form of Testosterone, meaning that I don’t have to recieve an injection anywhere near as often as I used to while on Sustanon 250 – which was 1ml every 2 weeks.

I have thought about pellets, however right now Reandron is working fairly well for me. It was only the other day I was talking to my Wife about how I might like to see my current GP regarding other routes of administration, more specifically the pellets, because it’s something I do think about occasionally.

I have never used creams or gels, though. They’re not something I was ever really interested in trying.

Can you go into more detail about how you changed your gender legally?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Sure can.

I waited until I had my hysto before I changed my gender, as I was able to get my hysto covered by the government while I was still legally female.

There were mere months before I “had” to get my gender changed, in order to be able to legally marry my Wife. We’d booked out wedding, sent out invitations etc.

Right after my Hysto I began the process of getting my marker changed on my birth certificate. There were forms I could download from the Births, Deaths and Marriages website, which included explicit instructions detailing what evidence I must provide etc.
The “main” thing was the form requiring two independant statutory declerations (legally binding) from two different Medical Doctors which had either administered Hormone Treatment or Surgery pertaining to my gender reassignment.

My chest surgeon was a few hours drive away, and ridiculously expensive for even a consult requiring just a signature. I decided to get my treating GP (of almost 8 years at that stage) to sign one of the stat. dec’s, and my Hysto surgeon the other. It was pretty specific in the fact that they both had to be present and witness each other’s signings, but luckily my GP was super accomodating and met me at the Hysto surgeon’s consult rooms one day after they’d both finished work.

I was super paranoid that B, D & M’s wouldn’t, for whatever reason, accept my paperwork – so I overcompensated by providing official copies (signed by a Justice of the Peace) of every single piece of medical paperwork, psychological reports etc pertaining to my transition to date. I also had to pay a fee somewhere in the vicinity of $60-$100. I can’t remember exactly.

All in all, I certainly went overboard but the turn around time was fairly rapid for a Government organisation, and I had my ammended Birth Certificate in the mail. Previously my old Birth Cert had, on the reverse, a “change of name” declaration, indicating my name had been changed from BIRTH NAME to CURRENT NAME in giant, bold letters. Now, there is no such thing on my Birth Certificate – it says “Male” next to my Sex, and has my current name without mention of previous – which was a welcome relief.

Internal Conflict.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

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I often feel like a hypocrite, or paradoxical at the very
least.

I have been stealth for my entire transition, “deep stealth”
for the last nine years. It’s the way I wanted things to be, because being
transsexual is not my identity and is not who I am.

But recently I’ve begun to yearn for some form of… not
visibility per se, but a safe place where I can speak openly about my history
and the issues that go along with being post-transition.

In a town such as this, where being different could mean
something as small as not conforming to the town’s narrow and outdated idea of
dress codes, it feel suffocating to know that those around me would likely
literally harm me if they were to find out about my history.

I am relived that we are fitting in here so well according
to societal norm, while at the same time frustrated with the lack of open
minded individuals. Not even in relation to outing myself, because I guess that’s
not entirely the crux of the problem – more so just feeling as though I can
relate on a wholly human level without a sense of pretence or distain for those
that may not share my views, whatever they may be.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I now remember why I got my hyso before I changed my sex! Thank goodness for Wives with great memories.

I could have legally done it before hand, however if I wanted my hysto covered by medicare I needed to be legally female to do so. Men don’t need hystos, there’s no code in the system to put it through if I were legally male already.
I wanted it covered via public health, so I waited to change my sex in order to do so.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I’ve been reflecting on my transition a little bit lately.

If it weren’t for my Wife’s incessant need to journal the entirity of my top surgery, I’d not likely be able to give you more than a bare recreation of events. Likewise, and probably more significantly was my hysto – which beyond a few minor things I can hardly even recollect. All I was concerned with is that it meant I could change my legal sex, thus marry my Wife.

Not quite sure where this is going.

whats your favourite stp you’ve tried so far?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I’d say as far as “not needing to think about it” and packing is concerned, I prefer the Peecock over any other product I’ve tried.

I never had an issue peeing with it (it’s a Gen 1) and I don’t need to think, or stand awakwardly to use it at a urinal. It feels natural..ish.

But I hate the lack of realism, perhaps the new gen peecock will rectify that disparity.