Tag: trans

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

So, our lives have been thrown into chaos lately due to having to unexpectedly vacate the rental we are living in.

Alongside this, we had to put our beloved family cat down two weeks ago and little K hasn’t been taking it very well. They slept together every night, and K was smitten with our cat.

We’re surviving though. Wife got a new job with more hours, and we’ve secured the new rental which is not only cheaper rent, but far more suited to our family than the current rental anyhow.

I’d say with the amount I’m working, alongside my Wife landing that new job – we’ll have enough saved for a deposit on our own little house in 12 months time.

Life is hectic, but our love surpasses anything.

Impending Weekend.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Work has been so full on and stressful lately, I’m loving every second I am away from the office.
The weekend is creeping up, and we’re all going on a road trip to visit my parents, in particular my Mother – for Mother’s Day.
Mum’s really excited because both of my Sisters and thier kids and spouses will be there too – we’ll all be in the same state at the same time.

This post has been tricky to write, because I’m trying to leave out most details and make this a little less personal.

I’m excited to see K and his cousins play and interact – they’re all fairly similar in age, and K is super excited to see them.
I’m a little apprehensive with regards to my Sisters and I being in the same space for so long together. They’re good people, and we certainly get along but I do have quite a bit of old anxieties when I’m around my whole family at once.
It’s like, old memories of pre transition and they get stuck in my mind. I can’t really articulate it properly. 

And for some reason they feel ownership over my history – they’ve outed me to random fucking people here and there, and when I pull them up on it and get angry they say stupid shit like “You can’t deny your past, you shouldn’t hide who you are!” and it makes me want to smash things. So I tend to avoid them a fair bit as a result.

Regardless, it will be a welcome distraction from thinking about work.

Lately, as in the last 24 hours, I’ve read a couple of accounts of people coming out in support of the trans child in their life. I think it’s great that the issue is getting publicity. However, as someone that chooses to live as stealth as possible I feel like it’s not necessarily fair for their families to out them when they are 5 or 6 years old. This is not something that I would want to show up should somebody choose to Google my name. What are your thoughts?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I agree.

I often see these stories/television programs and forget that these kids will eventually grow up and most likely want to be stealth, or at the very least just live thier lives.
While I would love to have been able to access hormone replacement therapy, puberty blockers and therapy as early as some of these children have, I think that comes with a certain degree of publicity and a lot of “supporters” forget that media nowdays is permanent. Archives are so readily available online that years after a story is published, a simply keyword search will yeild many results.

Hi, I need a little bit of help and I thought that you would be the most knowledgeable. My mom and uncle are saying that my personality has changed since being on t, that I’ve become more agressive. How do I combat this?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Do you feel you have become more agressive on T?

I guess this is a difficult question to answer; personally I can attest to the change in senation of anger itself. It is far more easy to access nowdays comparatively speaking, but that’s not to say I can’t control it because I most certainly can.

I think how we experience emotions changes when starting HRT, but how you respond to your emotions doesn’t have to.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I’m going to have even less time than I already do to update here, so I’m putting out a call for Questions I can answer at my own pace to keep content rolling in.

how’d you are your wife meet? And if you don’t mind me asking how many years did you guys get married after meeting?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I’m almost certain I have answered this before, but I can’t seem to find it so it warrants another go.

My Wife and I met via a conference in the top end of Australia; both our universities had sent us there and from first sight, we were both smitten.
I spent the entire conference with her, every second, and we began a long-distance relationship after we returned to our seperate states.
It took me two months to realise I needed to move to be with her, and I did.
I proposed to her about 6 months into our relationship, and she said yes.

We have been together for 10 years, and married for 3 years. We waited so long for the actual wedding as I was not yet legally male and still had to have my hysto etc.

This has now been added to the FAQ.

It’s 1am here in America and I’ve had a bad headache and haven’t been able to sleep because I’ve been struggling so much thinking about my future. I have an unsupportive family and I’m at the point where I need to make changes in my life if I want to be happy. I felt really sad and depressed and have been crying so I came on tumblr to distract myself and your page came up in my suggestions. Your posts give me hope and I want to say thank you so much for sharing your personal experiences.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Hey man.

Thank you for the kind words.
You’re most certainly not alone, and feel free to message me any time you aren’t feeling great. It may take me a while to respond, because I’m super busy but I do read every single ask that comes into my box.

You future is going to happen regardless of whether you lay there worrying about it, I promise. It’s difficult to just “let go” but ultimately – that’s the best thing to do. I know it’s hard.

Distraction is a great therapy for a worried mind. I use this tactic all the time and it’s brilliant for us stress heads; check out something that makes your heart flutter, or your mind whizz, or watch cute cat videos on youtube, or watch a super interesting documentary.

This hasn’t been very helpful and I do apologize, but feel free to contact me any time you feel the need.

Hello. I’m not really sure how to ask this, so it may sound like rambling. I am 17, and FtM. I really want to adopt kids some day. I am worried they will hate me or maybe get bullied or something because of who I am. Is there a way that would be best to tell them who I was so they don’t freak out and disown me? A prime age? I know I am a big young to worry about stuff like this, but it taints my daydreams when my own kids turn against me or run away haha (but really…). Thanks!

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Hey. Never apologize for asking a question, the only silly question is that which is left unasked.

I think becoming a parent when you are trans is always going to be fraught with “what if?” type scenarios. But ultimately; kids don’t give a fuck if you have three heads and are green, as long as you love and care for them.

It’s terrifying, but the only thing I can think of more terrifying is not living the life you truly want.

As an aside, here is a link about coming out to K, and here is a link to a great rescource pertaining to coming out to your kids called the “Little Boy Book” produced by FTM Australia, available in hard copy for a fee or for free in .PDF form.

How do you even come out to your parents? My father pretty much hates anything nontraditional and I’m afraid of losing him if I come out. What can I do to soften the blow?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Coming out is a very personal and intimate process, but there are several ways in which to come out and “lessen” the impact in can have on you directly.
I suggest writing a thorough coming out letter – it allows you to speak your mind without getting interrupted, and gives the reader an opportunity for information to sink in.

For what it’s worth, HERE is my “coming out” post.