Tag: trans man

Sam STP Review – NYTC.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

So I have had the Sam STP from the New York Toy Collective for a little under a month now, and feel as though I have spent enough time using and wearing it to be able to produce an accurate review. This is not a paid review, and I am not affiliated with any companies mentioned in any way.

Overview of Sam STP.

General Overview:
I purchase the packer in the “Caramel” color after reading recommendations that the lightest shade is not particularly skin-tone friendly despite me being of fair complexion. I’m really happy I didn’t go with the lighter shade, as this color works well for me.
I was most concerned about the packing aspect, as I prefer to pack ‘down’ and you simply cannot pack this way with the Sam. I can happily announce that although it took a little getting used to, packing ‘up’ now feels normal and doesn’t create an obscene bulge, even in tight pants.

Sam STP, Side View.

Aesthetic/Packing:
As mentioned previously, I was most concerned about the packing ability when purchasing this product. It arrived in a near little ziploc bag with NYTC logo on it, after I’d opened a non-descript brown box.
Initial thoughts have held true: this is a fairly realistic packer for the price in terms of looks. It has nicely detailed balls, and the shaft – although much girthier than any of my previous packers, is also well detailed and sculpted.
The balls seem like two rubber bounce balls; they have no give and feel odd with a squeeze test and in pants. This however, is due to the receptacle design for STP use. I have been packing in tighter-fitting brief style underwear with no problems. I do not use a harness.

Sam STP, Receptacle View.

STP/Peeing:
The moment you’ve all been waiting for! I have a rather firm grasp on where my urethra is located, and have literally never met an STP I could not pee through after some getting used to. The Sam STP is no exception and I didn’t even bother taking off my pants as a precaution prior to using it for the first time. Success! The receptacle is wide, the firm balls allow for single-handed use and support with ease and the length of the shaft is great.
I find this STP as opposed to others particularly good when using through the fly of pants. Something I had difficulty with other types of packers.

Total Score: I’d give the Sam STP packer a solid 8/10 – the price point and functionality are fantastic, especially for the high quality silicone you receive. Packing might be an issue if you don’t like to pack ‘up’ but it sits well in briefs when packing this way, and does not cause discomfort for me.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

If I put up a packer review with accompanying photos, will it be allowed under Tumblrs new strict no-porn guidelines?

I don’t want to waste my time writing an in-depth review for nothing.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Just ordered an STP for the first time in years.

If it doesn’t pack right I’m going to be pissed off. Got a Sam STP from New York Toy Collective because if it doesn’t sit well with me I won’t have wasted as much money as I potentially could have.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I just got back from a meeting with a 15 year old trans guy in my town. It was something I was asked to do by a good friend, and it was a good experience. The kid has just come out to his parents and is a little freaked out by thier response. It went well.

There’s another young bloke in town who is completely out socially spealing – same high school as the initial kid.

He got the hell beaten out of him last week, broken ribs and hospitalised because the local boys wanted to “show him how to fight like a man”.

It has been weighing heavily on my mind since – so when this opportunity presented I decided to take it.

I don’t know how I’m feeling about all this shit lately, but I’m sure feeling something alright.

Update.

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I promised an update a while back, then promptly never got around to writing it. It’s been so long and there’s so much to say that I often attempt to begin only to find myself pretty overwhelmed with the task. 

I’ll do my best, even if it’s only short.

K turns 13 this weekend. It’s ridiculous that I can even say that – thirteen. He’s grown so much, entered High School (!) and is loving having more independence. Due to our rural locale, he has to get up early and catch the bus to his school – then in reverse. This see’s him have longer hours than a lot of 9-5ers, and at first we were concerned about how this would impact him. 

To his credit, he’s taken things in his stride. He adores his campus and his teachers, and his last school report is the best one we’ve ever had yet. It’s such a lovely change to see him enjoy school for the first time since we moved here. 

I taught him how to shave recently, too. We got his school photos back about 4 weeks after they were taken, and in the photo his moustache was significant and noticable! His school is fairly strict on a no-facial-hair policy, and on a whim I decided to teach him how to wet shave. I’m a bit proponent of old school style wet shaving with a badger hair brush, shave soap and a double edged razor. Needless to say, kiddo got a bic and used my brush and soap. He only had to shave his moustache, and he missed the edges so I had to help get those. 
I’m not going to lie, it was quite emotional. My Wife snapped a photo of the process and I will cherish that. 

What else? He’s begun singling me out to ask more questions relating to men, as opposed to his Mum. That’s new, because he’s always been a Mumma’s boy. This is apparently a developmental milestone in kid’s teenage years. 

All in all, K is such a wonderful human being and I am so thankful for the privilege to be his Father. 

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Recently I have been embroiled in an inner battle – stealth. 

It’s difficult for me to articulate as I know beyond measure that I will stay stealth; it’s just how it is here. It’s safer for not only me, but most importantly my family. 

I just can’t shake that fucking nagging, tugging… I think it’s because we are finally finding kindred people. Friends. It’s lovely and reassuring and beautiful but I constantly find myself building a wall around myself. Just in case. 

It’s exhausting, tiring and I am sick of feeling like I am not living authentically, despite me knowing entirely otherwise. 

There’s a job going, I’m not only qualified for it but it’s a substantial pay increase from my current position with room to move up in the company.

I am not applying as the role is centred around working with GLBTIQ/CALD/People with Disabilities and I feel like I couldn’t do that job and not be out, to some degree at least. 

Fuck emotions are confusing. 

have you had/do you still get hip dysphoria? i’m a year on T and still trying to figure out how to manage feeling like i’m always going to have an hourglass figure despite how much i work out. i dont feel like i’m ever going to get muscular enough (because i physically don’t have time to as both a full time employee and a full time student) and i don’t know how to come to terms with that

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I still suffer quite severely with hip dysphoria in particular. 
I have, as my Mother puts it “child-bearing hips” and they are often the bane of my existence. 

I find keeping my body fat % as low as I can without being silly, and working out to accentuate your upper shoulders/traps/back muscles can create the “inverse triangle” look; effectively making your hips look smaller. 

Other methods I use are buying pants one size too large and wearing them lower on the hips than I usually would – this way the pants hang straight down and don’t hug anywhere. I get antsy when I wear tight pants. 

Sometimes we’re just given body types we really don’t like. There’s not much I can do about my hip bone structure, but I can do other things to minimise the impact that it does have on me. 

Also – don’t use full length mirrors if you can avoid it. 

I hope any of that was helpful, and I’d like to commiserate with you as part of the “my hips are rather fucking large for a man” club. 

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Happy New Year everyone!

K starts high school in two weeks. It’s freaking us all out! The school he chose (yep, we let kiddo choose from a bunch we thought were good) is amazing. Robotics lab, forensic science in years 11 and 12. Actually ridiculous, and I am very thankful we only have one child as it’s an enormous amount of money. 

He couldn’t go to the (only) local public high school for a plethora of reasons, the least of which being I have come across seniors who are unable to read. 
I’m fucking serious. 

Regardless, we had a great break. Mrs had some health issues which scared the living crap outta me (hospitalised for a while there, never life threatening), but Master K was kept at an arms length with friends and wasn’t aware of that. He has enough to deal with currently. 

Our homestead is coming along wonderfully. We’re already harvesting fruit and vegetables from the seeds we sowed when we first moved in. I love fresh tomatoes so very much. 

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My Father brought us the handmade reclaimed regum dining table he created for us yesterday.

It’s difficult to articulate just how important to me it is to have a piece created by my Dad while he’s still able. He’s lost all sensation in his right hand now, so he built the whole thing with his non dominant hand/arm.

Once we got it inside (fuck, redgum is heavy!) we sat around it the whole afternoon eating, chatting and having a few beers.

K will inherit this table, and it will outlive even his children.

On another note: the year is winding down and my mental health is kind of on the rocks so I’ll be taking a small break from tumblr.
I’ll be back soonish though.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

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Despite my best attempts, I continuously have at least 4 messages regardless of empty inboxes. 

IDK why, but I can’t see them!