Tag: f2m

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Okay, as promised here’s a couple of photographs of the underwear which has a built in packing pocket. Well, it’s just how they’re made – not specifically for trans guys or anything however they work quite well.

As far as I know these are only avaliable in Australia.
Big W stores more specifically.

And yes, I did use a pillow as an underwear model. Shh.

Apologies for the oversized faded briefs used here, I don’t personally use these type of underpants anymore although I did for quite a number of years. I wear these type when going to the gym or swimming, though – they make me feel more secure.

I couldn’t find a photo of the packaging for the Men’s version of the multipack briefs pictured, however I found a photograph of the Boy’s briefs in the Allsorts brand, and the packaging looks much the same.

FTM Social Support Group.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

So yesterday I went to a local support group for older trans men.

I was really fucking nervous, changed like five times and put too much cologne on. Didn’t cut my head when shaving though, so bonus.

My friend who runs it came and picked me up, he’s in his mid 60’s and only transitioned about 4 years ago. Good dude, heaps odd though because he’s like a teenage boy in the body of an old man with a beard. hah.

Arrived and no one else was there, so my friend W who runs the group shouted me a beer and we grabbed a table away from the one or two other patrons in the bar. Within minutes two other guys arrived; J1 and J2. They were much older than me, although they didn’t look it because neither had begun T yet. After another short while a final guy came, V. He was maybe 5 years older than myself and beaming because he’d just gone on a first date. We all playfully ribbed him about it and ordered more beers.

There wasn’t much trans talk at all, which was awesome. We mentioned the one psych in our town who is able to help guys get their T letters, and how horrible he is with confidentiality, but that we’ve all seen him out of necessity. I spoke a bit about my balding and how long it took to get as bald as I am now. There was also some talk about underpants which are very cheap and also happen to have an inbuilt packer pouch.

Other than that it was; Relationships, Girlfriends/Wives, Football, Work, Me Moving.

It was really validating for me to be around a bunch of blokes that were just…blokes. Just happened to be trans too. And what’s more is that there’s a few of the older dudes who just can’t medically transition due to  medical issues, work issues, family issues etc. The only time they get to be called their real names and “he” is in this fortnightly group. I could see the appreciation on some of the guy’s faces when we referred to each other. Something so simple can be someone’s life line.

All in all, 10/10 would recommend. Will go again.

Giant Update of DOOM.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

So, I’ve been ridiculously busy as of late and haven’t had the time to sit down properly and update.

  • K took our friend’s death really well; he was most concerned about our friend’s children who don’t have their Daddy anymore. He wanted to attend the funeral, and it was his first. I was absolutely gone that day; can’t remember much of it and I wasn’t even drinking. It was a lovely service and my Friend would have loved the fact that we tried to wear his favorite football team colors.
  • On the drive home from the funeral K decided it was an awesome time to ask ever so innocently “So, Dad, when you were born a girl… what was it like? What was the hardest thing?” – Fuck! Okay, let’s do this. I answered honestly and although I felt I did a half-assed job, my Wife said I did brilliantly.
  • My Family is moving to a rural area; my Wife applied for a great job “just to see” and she got it immediately. We’ve decided she should take it, rent in the town for six or so months and then we will buy a house and land.
  • K is excited; his four cousins, Aunt and Uncle as well as Grandmother currently live in this small town. He’s upset at having to leave his friends here but we’ve set up some packs for his friends including Self Addressed Stamped Envelopes, his Email address, his Phone number, his Xbox Live Gamertag, Skype login and Steam username. This way his friends can still contact him.
  • I have one semester of my current degree to go, which equates to approximately 13 weeks of attendance. I will be staying here to finish my degree, renting with a friend in a house he owns. It’s going to be one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but it means realizing our dream of owning a house. I’m also doing a little over a full course load to finish in one semester, so I’ll be fucking busy.
  • K is most excited about the prospect of getting a dog. The rental my Wife and K will be staying in is not only almost half of what we currently pay/week but it also allows pets of any kind, and it’s not through an agent – private renal. Bonus.
  • Wife’s new job is less hours, same pay, easier job with a “better” recognized company.

So, not sure what else has been happening… we decided for sure we are moving two days ago and in that time we have literally packed 17 full boxes and a half dozen almost filled. We own a lot of shit.

Hi there, I hope to one day be a dad( I am a transguy) and I was curious what the biggest shock for you?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Hrm, the biggest shock…

In terms of being a Father, I’m assuming? Correct me if I’m wrong.
I’ve been thinking about this for a good amount of time, I deliberately didn’t answer it right away so I could make sure I answered this properly, but for the life of me I can’t think of what was the most “shocking" of all things.

I met K for the first time and literally ten minutes later he’d soiled his nappy (diaper?) – I volunteered immediately; I knew I’d better get the “firsts" over and done with ASAP because this child now depended on me, too, and I needed to give it my all. I wasn’t repulsed, I wasn’t grossed out – I had no clue what I was doing but my Wife talked me through it and everything went smoothly.
My Wife, then girlfriend, was shocked to say the very least. Any other man that had been in K’s life (as a byproduct of being in my Wife’s life) was vehemently opposed to doing anything remotely paternal in fear my Wife would seek thier commitment. Imbeciles.
Her ex boyfriend literally would not watch K while my Wife took ten minutes to have a shower – she would set K in up his high chair in the bathroom with her with a rusk and a few toys and watch him while she showered.

So; the biggest shock for me was how naturally I handled it all, and how easily it all came after the initial adjustment. More than anything, I was very shocked by how thankful and appreciative, incredulous almost, my Wife was of the things I was doing to try and learn and support them both.
To me, that’s just what a human should do if they love someone.

While K’s Away.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

It’s only been a few days since K left for his Grandmother’s, but within five hours my Wife and I felt the lack of his presence.

We’ve had to remember what it is couples do when they don’t have children. Last night we went out to the pub to meet up with some friends, and had a quick dinner.

We are so much more playful with each other right now. It’s so lovely and dynamic, and we are bouncing off of one another with chemistry. It makes me reflect upon when we first met eight years ago.

Lately it’s been showers together, giggling within seconds of waking up, falling asleep intertwined, music up as loud as we like, candles and incense and impromptu dinner outings.

We skype K each night, and text him, call him. He’s having an absolute blast; Hip Hop Dance classes, riding motorized buggys around his Grandmother’s 6 acre property, feeding ducks, playing with his cousins.

So many times I’ve been sleeping in (oh.my.word. I forgot what that felt like, you all fucking enjoy that you hear! haha) and woke up in a panic wondering where K is, why he hasn’t woken us, if I’ve made his breakfast or if We’re late for school. It’s just really fucking odd not having him around, and we miss him very much.

If you know me IRL, and don’t particularly want to read about my sex life, then don’t click this read more.

My Wife and I have made an agreement; after one of her colleauges remarked at how doing this improved her life greatly.

One month; sex every single day no matter how tired or busy we are.

That began last night – and if it’s anything to go by, this will be very fun. Of course when K returns we will need to be a little more covert. Hah.

But yes, we are both committed to the cause.

Hi, i’m looking to start T very soon. My girlfriend and I have been together for a while now and we’ve spoken about having children. I don’t want to carry a child but would like to have a biological child with my DNA. I guess my question is, what process would we have to go through so my girlfriend carries a child that is linked to me biologically?

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

I didn’t carry or donate any genetic material to my Son, who is technically my Step-Son.

The only way that I am aware of accomplishing this is to have your eggs frozen and stored, and have your girlfriend carry those fertilized eggs insider her as a surrogate. Once again, I am not a medical professional so your best option is to speak to someone who is.

As far as I am aware, you should most likely look into freezing your eggs prior to Testosterone, so as to have the maximum potential success for any future usage of them.

Some time ago, I made a stupid decision and outed a transgendered person without thinking before I spoke. Looking back, I’m not sure why I did this, and due to my anxiety disorder I’ve been unable to stop myself from feeling guilty since this happened and constantly stress over it. I feel like what I’ve done is completely unforgivable but I need some closure, and I wanted to ask for your opinion on it as you’re someone I greatly admire.

~ transmandad ~ Leave a comment

Firstly I want to say congratulations on your self reflection and assessment; I think it’s very bold to own up to past “mistakes”. Secondly I also want to remind you that, well, you’re human! We are fallable and often make mistakes in order to learn from them.

I can understand Anxiety Disorder, and if you were to message me off Anon, we can speak about that at length if you wish.

You need to understand that no amount of guilt or self punishment will “retract” past actions/words, nor will they make you feel any better about the situation. In fact, it’s likely to do the exact opposite.

If you are still in contact with said person, perhaps to gain the much needed closure you speak of, perhaps write them an Anon email or message or something similar, and apologize.

What you did wasn’t nice, but it’s certainly not “completely unforgivable” – I think by the way you have phrased this you are more than aware of the reprecussions of outing someone. That is more than enough of a lesson learnt; many trans people still don’t understand this.

Give yourself a break. You are human, and we all make mistakes. What is impressive to me is that you are working actively to try and rectify what you see as a wrongdoing. Again, much more than most people ever do. Well done.