Early thirties post-transition stealth Father and Husband
Distraction is the best possible solution for me, so perhaps try to talk about awesome positive things unrelated to transition while on the phone.
There is a list of helpful things to quell dysphoria floating around somewhere, but I’m unsure of it’s specific location sorry.
Followers; any suggestions?
Not too personal; I answer this all the time.
Full details are available in my FAQ, but short version is K is my Wifes natal Son, I came into their lives when K was 11 months old.
You are all likely as annoyed by my lack of posts as I am.
There’s an okay reason though; my Wife and I are heads down working as much as we possibly can.
We’re inspecting a property on Saturday.
Yeah, for real. We’ve not quite reached our savings goal, but this property ticks many boxes and unless we inspect there’s no way to know if we actually want to aim for this place.
If it really is perfect, I’ve found a way to fast-track our deposit, but it will cost us a couple of thousand more in the long run.
This is an okay trade off as house prices have risen 30-50K since we moved here three years ago and with many new major business centers opening, it’s set to continue. We don’t want to find ourselves priced out of the market.
So we might not (likely won’t) purchase this property, but in the event that it’s everything we want and more – we can at least do this. And that gives me so much excitement/anxiety. The only reason I want to purchase a house is so I can give K and my Wife stability, and leave K with a home after we pass. In major metropolitan areas, purchasing a house is almost unrealistic nowdays.
It’s blowing my mind, and we’re all beside ourselves with cautious energy.
So, in short – I’ve been hella busy!
Also – K turns 12 this year so the statement “My Son turns 13 next year.” Is valid and that is terrifying!
It’s silly – my Wife and I have been together for coming up to 11 years this year and she still makes my heart do loops when she smiles.
My ‘go-to’ packer is still an older gen Peecock as I can pee freely with it, it packs well and if needed I can play with it.
I wear a packer pretty much 24/7 unless I’m at home only and the weather is very warm. Then I may go without.
Packing is a very specific and individual thing, especially in regards to preferences. No one can really tell you what packer will work for you the best.
I highly recommend a few different sizes of the Mr Limpy to get a feel (hah!) for what size you prefer as they’re inexpensive and you can make them into STPs if you wish.
As for bottom dysphoria – packing is the only thing that I’ve found to alleviate it. However sometimes packing actually accentuates the missing link, so to speak. Self care is super important – so listen to yourself and act accordingly.
Wow – I’m a jerk for neglecting this tumblr, I apologize.
I’m super busy and this house deposit saving business has become our biggest focus.
I will tend to messages in a few hours.
It’s my last day of Annual Leave and I wish I could do this all over again.
It’s been gorgeous; adventuring with K and my Wife, eating amazing foods, carching up with extended family, road trips, parties, bush walks…
I do have direct experience with this dynamic; and I remember clearly feeling very put out by it.
I’ve become a master in conflict diffusion; and I don’t see that in any way being a “coward”. Anger is so easily accessible, I’m not about to jump in and create further tension unless someone is threatening my family or anyone I love.
I’m not quite sure how this little diatribe could be considered in any way helpful other than me empathizing with you greatly.
Be the type of man you would want to see in the world, lead by example. By all means kick ass and take names if anyone tries to hurt you – but use it as a tool, not a reaction.
Christmas at my parents is already challenging and it’s only the 23rd here!
transmandad 